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Marriage is hard

Marriage is hard

You see this phrase often.  Just yesterday I saw this in some article I was reading and I thought to myself, “I don’t feel like being married to Matt is hard.”  I wondered what Matt thought about this so I asked him last night and he said the same thing I did, “being married isn’t hard.”

I feel like I need to say that everyday you have to work at being married but overall I don’t feel like it’s hard.  (We still have our disagreements and the first 2 years hasn’t always been a picnic but overall it’s good.)  I’ve been in relationships that were hard or difficult but for some reason our relationship just seems to fit.  I think a lot of this comes from Matt not being the type to try and piss me off and me understanding and realizing this, therefore I don’t “sweat the small stuff” nearly as much as I used to.  I feel I’m very conscience in my thinking of “is this really worth it”.  Most of the time it’s not worth the extra energy to make something a bigger deal than it really is.

I have a lot of friends that got married around the same time as us and it seems like there are a lot of complaints, from small stuff to large stuff.  I’m honestly so glad that’s not me, not anymore.  We have our routines and things just seem to work.  Sure Matt annoys me from time to time and I know I annoy him and that’s okay.

This morning I saw an article about contracting marriages for 10 years.  This would be to cut down on the divorce rate I guess.  You give it 10 years and at the end decide if you want to renew your contract or leave.  I’m not really sure how I feel about this concept.  On one hand, I would absolutely sign a 10 year agreement with Matt.  But not because I thought it wouldn’t last past that or that one of us would want out but because to me that’s like saying I KNOW we can last 10 years, and 20 and so on.  So if that’s my thought, then would I really need a contract?  I guess not.

Honestly I feel like it’s a pretty silly “solution” if you were.  I feel the biggest problem with the divorce rate is people aren’t willing to fight for their marriages anymore.  I’ve been divorced and 1 person can’t make a marriage.  Both people have to be willing to fight for it.  I think we are a very throw away society now and that is reflected in the divorce rate.  I also feel a lot of this comes from having 2 income households.  Back in the day it was much harder to leave because women weren’t able to provide the way they can now.  I’m not saying I think we need to go back to this it’s merely a thought.

Clearly I have no solution for this problem and I’m going to start rambling soon.

Happy Friday!

~k

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